"What do they really wear under the Kilt?"

The other day I got asked this question - "What do you wear under your Kilt?".

The person asking is a missionary from Texas and he has been teaching a person with a strong Scottish background.

So I happened to have a copy of a Scottish products catalog and showed him a version of the famous shirt that has the top ten responses.

You may view the t-shirt on the Celtic Croft website in detail here.

Here is what they have on the t-shirt and part of the list.  For those that want something a little cleaner you'd have to dump about half the list.

1.   My shoes and socks
2.   Nothing worn - Everything is in perfect working order
3.   My furry pouch - oh wait that is on top.
4.   A very fine set of accessories
5.   My used beer dispenser
6.   Good girls don't ask, bad girls find out
7.   My Claymore - and it's in need of a good polishing.....
8.   Lipstick when I'm lucky....
9.   If your brave enough to ask, you're brave enough to find out
10. I'll show you mind if you show me yours

Another interesting version can be viewed here from USA Kilts

There are also some great responses in the must read book for those that will be using a kilt.  It's called "So you're going to wear the Kilt!"  by  J. Charles Thompson.  They are much cleaner but basically, rest on the 'plumbing is working do you need a demonstration?'





So as you can see there are a few catchy things you can say to someone that is questioning you about what you are wearing under your kilt.

The Kilt in and of itself is very interesting.  It's almost always historically made of a tartan material of wool.

The interesting part is that within the Celtic culture tartan style material/cloth has been in use for millennia.  However, the kilt seems to be a bit of a more modern invention even though it is one of the great symbols of Scotland along with the Bagpipe.
The origins of the kilt are somewhat cloud in the mysteries of time and space.  The Britain Celts who were closely associated with the Romans for several hundred years appear to not have used any style of kilt at that time.  The Celts on the European Continent also have no historical use of the Kilt.  It was more trousers.  The Irish also seem to not have used one though it is generally accepted that the fore runner of the modern kilt is or was the Breacan an Fhéilidh (belted plaid) or Feileadh Mòr (great plaid).



Basically the original kilts were large pieces of cloth that were pleated by hand (kilting) and then belted around the middle.  This left a huge amount of material that could be thrown over the shoulder and wrapped around the user.  These could and would be a little short on the bottom side.  Not nearly getting to the knee in many cases and this lends credence to that Mr. Thompson says are the Victorian ear kilts that go to the knee or beyond.

I find it is best if the kilt goes to around the knee.  For modesty and religious reasons even my shorts need to be that long.  It's kind of slutty for a woman to use a micro mini with no leggings and a super short kilt is just unbecoming to a man no matter his age.

Kilts as we know them today started to appear at least in the 16th century.  They were present for all the Jacobite rebellions. Though the chieftains likely used Thews (plaid pants) so they could ride horses easier.  The general soldier or clansman wore the kilt and even removed it in many cases to fight and tied his shirt between his legs.



Over time the kilt began to shed the additional material that was above the waist.  This may have been for comfort or other similar reasons as more and more Scots moved around the world.

Today the kilt is made of about 3 yards of tartan material.  It is pleated to the sett by the maker and includes buckles and straps to help secure it.  It is also used for more formal events and less for everyday use.  Though in reality a person may use the same kilt at the local Highland Games and then a week or so later at his friends wedding.  It is the upper accessories that change.  The style of shirt, the coat or lack there of, the plaid, the cap, the style or quality of the sporran and the Sgian dubh.



So for those that are brave enough these days to wear a kilt. What do they use or wear under there?

It all come down to personal preference.  I've seen many a caber tosser, or heavy athlete that uses so type of tight fitting short.  Not them mighty whitey underwear so many use daily.  More like athletic shorts.  They whirl, and turn and twist so much you'd see more then you want at some point.  Also the few guys that do highland dancing any more also use some type of shorts under there.  They also whirl, twist, and turn and jump so much you need to.  We've seen more then our fair share of dancer's under garments without out even trying.

So I think things like these t-shirts with a list of interesting things to say when someone wants to know what is under your kilt are just for fun, and to help keep the mystery going.  At times I think these quick, cheesy, and sometimes lewd, responses are just what people need.  We don't go around asking a lady what she has on under her skirt.  It would be interesting if they stated to describe in detail their panties to the poor sick bum that was crazy enough to ask.




One shirt states - "If there is underwear under there it's called a skirt!"

I'll let you decide what I might be wearing under my kilt the next time I'm at the local Scottish Fair.

Buaidh - NO - Bas

Scottish Festival and Highland Games

This weekend is the annual Scottish Festival and Highland Games at the local Orange County Fair grounds.

This event is in it's 80th year or so and has been renamed SCOTS FEST - A Scottish Festival of Celtic Entertainment and Food to more properly reflect what it truly has become.
It's two days of true Scottish culture with all the fine points one would expect.  Highland dancing, Pipe band competition, athletics (Caber toss, hammer throw, weight for height etc), Clan Societies, and plenty of food, drinks and entertainment (Bad Haggis, Sligo Rags, Highland Way and Tempest) of all sorts.








This event has become a family tradition with us.  We head there every memorial day weekend to get our slice of highland culture.

It's a great opportunity to see all our old friends from our Clan Society (http://macdougall.org).  This is one of the best places to find your Scottish roots.  Most if not all of the clan tents have some type of listing of the Septs (family names) associated to the clan.  Many also have some fairly comprehensive books on Scottish surnames that can also be helpful in locating at least some connection.  There are so many people with a vast array of knowledge that your bound to find something out if you try hard enough.  Granted that every clan had their fair share of Smiths since they all had black smiths and the like in the local village.






Though my wife and daughter do not get to excited about the athletics I do like to try and see a few guys try and toss the caber.  Unfortunately, we generally have to split up to pull this off.  Way too many things going on.

Caber Toss

Caber, in Gaelic, means simply pole or rafter. Unlike the standardized instruments common to modern track and field events, it has no fixed weight or dimensions. Contestants on a particular day all have to try with the log at hand. In the event no one is able to turn it (end over end) successfully, it is common practice to saw a piece off until someone is able to turn it. It should be noted that the goal of the effort is not distance, but to toss the log end-over-end so that it lands in a straight line from the tosser. Points are deducted according to the number of degrees off from the ideal 12 o'clock mark. The greater handicap in this event isn't the weight of the caber, but its length. 

Scotsfest section on athletics 

Some times everyone has trouble getting the caber to turn.  Other times a couple of guys are able to turn the caber.  It is always fun and can be potentially risky depending where you position yourself to watch.  Some guys due to the size of the caber have a real hard time getting it to balance properly so that can begin their attempted at turning it.  This has involved stepping backwards and the like. Thus the risk if the person has to drop the caber; not fun to be hit by a telephone pole.

Other events that are fun to watch is the Highland Dancing.  It is just amazing what those girls can do.

And the pile of Celtic apparel and clothing you see people wearing and that is available to buy.

Back in the day just before I got married I went and purchased a kilt package from a vendor at the fair.  Unfortunately, I had problems with the vendor fulfilling my order and had to take them to small claims court.  They thankfully do not exist anymore and are not at the fair any longer.  It sure was a deal but, it was a pain when I had to go and acquire varies pieces to have a complete outfit for my wedding reception.

I do get a kick out of the many t-shirts that are available to specify and answer the ultimate question - WHAT DO YOU WEAR UNDER THAT KILT?

In a book I have entitled - So you are going to wear the kilt: Revised 3rd edition by J. Charles Thompson  there is a section that discusses how to handle those questions.  You won't get much of that at Scotsfest.  Since many a person at the fair is wearing a kilt no one asks.  In reality it is when your the only wearing the kilt that you have a higher chance of getting asked.

So how do you respond?  Since it referencing such a private affair and parts that people don't like to talk about it can become hard. He says to use something along the lines of "The plumbing is all in working order, do you need a demonstration?", or "My shoes".   Basically something simple to put them off.  You have to keep up the mystic of the whole affair.  In the past people wore nothing underneath the kilt.  Now a days you find all kinds of athletic shorts and other types of undergarments.  I think I even read that they changed policy for the dragoons guards and other highland regiments in regards to the lack of clothing under the kilt.  It is now considered tacky to not use anything under your kilt.  But if you really tell someone what is down there the mystery goes away.   A shirt with some ideas for responding presents some seedy ideas.  A few of the cleaner ones are - Fine set of accessories, socks and shoes, etc.  To see all the saying and the actual shirt click here  or click here Your sure to get a laugh even if you are considered a bit of a prude.  Below are a few other choices naturally cleaner then some of the above options.





  

So as we celebrate our Scottish heritage take the chance to get your kilt out and wear it.  Listen to some great bagpipe music and enjoy some Haggis if that is to your liking.

If you think you might be related to some famous Scotsman or other British isles royalty then you should check out my post entitled - Are you Related to someone Famous?

Buaidh -  NO - Bas